In the past few years, I have been in several intimate romantic relationships. In these relationships, I’ve loved and been loved; I’ve laughed and I’ve cried; I’ve grown and had my heart broken. Romantic relationships are so powerful: so full of love and growth, and yet they can be tremendously challenging as well.
When I’ve been in romantic relationships, I’ve looked to guidance from my partners, my friends, my teachers, my therapist… and books. Real live people know you best of all, can call you on your bullshit and hold you with love when your heart is hurting. But there is also a tremendous amount of wisdom in the written word.
In this series, I’ll share and summarize my favorite books on relationships, and what I took away from them, what they meant to me personally. These books made a significant impact on me – they were the right book at the right time, and I’ll be thinking about them for the rest of my life. But they’re not necessarily unambiguous recommendations. I have complicated feelings and some reservations and open questions about each of these books. They might not be the right book for you. Still, I wanted to share the books that have given me the most significant opportunities for reflection and growth in such an important area of being human.